When less is really more
Wow, the snow came back and all of sudden it feels like Winter. The fire was lit first thing yesterday and I had this overwhelming urge to de-clutter, motivated by Saturday Sanctuary, a monthly gathering I created in January.
The focus of March was about de-cluttering, simplifying, creating space both in our physical environments and in our heads, which in turn creates more calm, coherency and clarity in how we feel!
It's so true, isn't it?!. I know when I simplify, I feel so much better in myself! It's a no-brainer.
Let's be honest, Spring is a great time to say yes to getting stuff done, getting things sorted and feeling that sense of freshness, invigoration and hope that we are out the other side of winter! Seeing those daffodils literally makes me want to jump up and down.
If a good sort out or de-clutter is on the cards for you, here are some questions to ask yourself.
These questions, when asked and discussed in Saturday's session, brought up lots of similar feelings, thoughts, and insights from the ladies who came. They shared how not clearing clutter (things no longer needed or wanted) impacts their self-esteem negatively, they feel chaotic, stuck, disorganized, not in control, anxious, overwhelmed, embarrassed and frustrated.
Digging deeper holding on to stuff we really don't need, nor want can mean everything from fear-based beliefs of not having enough, or even loosing what you have, to not being able to let go, holding on to the past or to an unwillingness to change.
The important thing to remember is that life is about movement, change, and progress. The idea of letting go and giving away invites and opens the way for something new. For new energy, momentum and opportunity to reveal itself to you. It's remembering the natural state of ebb and flow, up and down, give and take, open and close.
Hanging on to things can drain your energy without you even realizing, create anxiety because it's in the back of your mind constantly, you know the files you need to sort, the room, the office, the paperwork, toys, clothes and so forth. I know this is true for me.
Here are the questions. Grab and pen and paper or journal and get started.
First, let's get a sense of how satisfied/happy you are with your home environ
ment or a particular space in your home.
10 = It feels fab. You are totally happy with it. 0 = It feels bad. You are really unhappy with it.
Check in with yourself and see where you're at on that scale! What number comes to mind? The best place to start anything is to accept where you are and go from there.
What feelings come up for you when you think about de-cluttering?
What stops you from doing what you really desire to?
Close your eyes and imagine it's the first time walking through your home (or the space you want to change or de-clutter), take a fresh look, what do you see as you open the door? What do you see? What do you feel? What sense do you get from the space? How would you describe the person that lives there?
This question really helps see the truth of your situation. You may notice doing this brings up uncomfortable feelings. Don't beat yourself up. Instead, affirm I am in the process of de-cluttering and sorting all of this out. Connect as much as possible to the vision you have for this space or room. What you truly desire to create.
What do you think is powerful about de-cluttering?
How will you feel if you go ahead and get cracking?
What positive impact with it have on you and those around you?
What do you feel would be the biggest or most important benefit?
What do you value about the space you have in mind? For example, if it's your bedroom, your values maybe peace and harmony.
Ask yourself what values matter to you in relation to your physical environment.
What could you do to create the desired space? What do you see yourself doing?
What inner critical voice needs to take a hike as you create these positive changes in your environment? Inner critical and negative voices could be saying that you'll never sort it out, why bother?
Keep affirming to yourself, I can and I am in the process of changing this room/ attic/ garage etc.
So now it's action time!
What are you going to do?
And when are you going to do it?
Decide what you are going to focus on first and then put a date in the diary to begin.
Ask a friend or family member to help if you need it.
Have fun. Listen to music.
See what you are doing a positive thing. Wish the items and things you are giving away well.
A classic example that came up during the session was wedding dresses and how many of the women still had theirs, yet knew that no-one they know will ever wear it. It lies in a box gathering dust.
So in this example imagine your wedding dress being found by a woman thrilled to find it and wear it. Thank your dress for the joy it brought you at the time. It's a great way to part with more special things that you may have been holding on to for sentimental reasons.
Keep the end result in mind. How you are going to feel when you've accomplished all the things you set out to do and achieve.
And remember to reward yourself when you're done!
PS If you're in Cardiff, check out www.deemackey.com/saturday-sanctuary for upcoming dates!
"I find a regular monthly session really helpful in giving me space where I can consciously think about me. A space to be selfish and more aware of what I'm doing and where I want to go in life. Dee puts you instantly at ease in this space and I would recommend this session to any busy ladies out there who just need an opportunity to 'check in' with themselves."